The "Loser" Mode

SO LONG since my last post. I apologise if there were people looking forward to my posts. Fact is, I'm suffering from a special mental illness called the Loser Mode. This illness happens to all humans, just that the duration and occurance differs.

In brief, here are the symptoms:

1. Lost of Motivation - The most obvious symptom to diagnose whether you have the Loser Mode is your lost of motivation to do anything. Even if things that you know you need to do them, you just can't find the mood to do it.

2. Lost of Confidence - Self-doubt would be a better description. Things that you thought ypu could handle with ease before now seemed impossible or frightening to do. Basically, you dare not do things that are relatively simple.

3. Lost of Will Power - Endurance significantly cut, resulting in a rise of Give-Up rate. Your attention span decreases as well. Hyper-restlessness and impatient.

4. Lost of Judgemental Accuracy - You tend to find fault in almost everything and anything except the only perfect person - yourself. Your ability to correctly judge whether who or what is at fault falls so low that you will always think that its not your fault that things went the wrong way. This causes an increase in the ability to generate excuses for you to avoid responsibilities.

5. Feeling of Loneliness - This is the not-so-obvious symptom as it's just an empty feeling that you don't know what it actually lacks. However, it's the most painful of all symptom.

Why did I say that this illness happen to all humans? Because it is in the human nature to doubt. Some people doubt their whole life, giving them the label: Losers. Some people suffers mild doses of this illness throughout their life but managed to put up a strong front to avoid detection. Some people who are aware of this illness stay clear away from the cause but sometimes inevitably fall victim to it.

For me, this illness lasts about 1 to 2 weeks occasionally. The loser complex this time was still mild but nonetheless damaging to both my commitments and daily life. I have yet to find a perfect cure. Since its a mental illness, nothing I consume will resolve though chocolates can temporarily relieve the pain.

I'm not sure if I'm fully recovered, but judging from the fact that I could find the interest to type this blog entry, I'm on my road to recovery. Hopefully, I can find back my motivation, confidence, will power, judgemental accuracy and get rid of the pesky loneliness feeling(it sucks).